Inexcusable excuses, part 2

One of the reasons I rarely go to see "chick flicks" anymore (besides the ridiculous jacked up prices of movie tickets) is because of the same objectifying material that is recycled over and over again. Consider the stereotypical female protagonist: a self-sufficient and obviously attractive woman who, for reasons us average women cannot understand, just can't seem to find the right man.

Cue the stereotypical male antagonist: a beer-guzzling, skirt-chasing sleezebag who sleeps with anything that moves. And every viewer knows, even before the opening credits finish, that these two archtypes will somehow end up together. The best, most current example of this ridiculousness is The Ugly Truth, with Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler.

The lack of originality is actually the least of my frustrations: it's the never-ending cycle of dehumanizing rhetoric, and the expectation that eventually, the so-called "strong, independent" woman will give in to it. It's all a part of my new fascination: rape culture. Consider how many times you've heard remarks like these:

"I'm going to make it with her."

"Tonight's the night I'm going to score."

"What a piece of meat."

Pretty commonplace, right? Consider these statistics as well:

One in twelve male students surveyed had committed acts that met the legal definitions of rape or attempted rape.

84 percent of those men who committed rape said that what they did was definitely not rape. (http://www.aaets.org/arts/art13.htm)

For the record, I'm well aware that men think about sex. A lot (as do women). Being tempted is not wrong. Wanting sex is not wrong. What is inexcusable, however, is the acceptance of women being treated as commodities or prizes. I don't know why, in this day and age, it is socially acceptable for men to think that way. It's inexcusable that there are men who resort to coercive tactics to get what they want, truly believing that as long as they aren't using excessive force, they aren't actually committing a crime.

This may leave many people wondering, how exactly does a guy know when a woman is giving consent? Well honestly, a guy should know a woman well enough to know what she wants and what she doesn't want. And if he doesn't, well...consider it an incentive to actually get to know a woman before deciding to sleep with her. Sure, it takes time, but it's a better alternative to being labeled a sex offender.

The more I research this, the more convinced I am that this is the direction I am meant to go as a chaplain (assuming that's still what I want to do once I get my Masters in divinity). I don't know if women's clinics/counseling centers for abuse survivors are in need of counselors in the clergy, but I am so sick of seeing women trying to find their identities in men, even if those men fail to treat them as the daughters of God that they really are. The lies this world will believe just break my heart. I am making it my mission to do something about it.