Feminism is a funny word in my vocabulary. For as long as I can remember, "feminism" is defined as this crazy, radical idea that women are human beings, and should be treated as much...meaning they are entitled to the same rights and privileges as men. Can't say I disagree with that definition, but unfortunately, that's not what is commonly associated with "feminism" when people hear it today.
I've been in the church long enough to have heard the rants of evangelicals, accusing feminism as the great destroyer of families, usurping traditional male duties, etc. I don't buy into those. I think there have been some unexpected consequences of the feminist movement, such as teaching women to have sex "like men" (without strings), and as long as both genders can get away with it, then that's equality. Feminists, from a stereotypical standpoint, tend to be in favor of abortion, which I am most definitely not. I believe there is nothing more feminine than a mother wanting to protect her child, in the womb and out. Consequently, I've avoided the label of "feminist" because I didn't want to have assumptions made about me that weren't true.
If I call myself a feminist, the evangelicals will call me a heretic. If I don't call myself a feminist, the rest of the world will see me as anti-woman. Are those my only options? I hope not, because they kind of suck. Clearly one side of the spectrum, or perhaps both, is misinformed.
Yet here I am, crusading for advocacy against rape culture, and appealing to the minds of liberals and conservatives alike. In this, we are all equally vulnerable. So that leaves me to question my beliefs about what I think feminism is...and why I'm so apprehensive to call myself one. Because really, as a woman, there must be something fundamentally wrong with me if I can't identify as such.
I'm rereading Jonalyn Fincher's book "Ruby Slippers," which addresses the Christian approach to femininity and women's roles in the church (and it's fantastic, for those who haven't read it). Throughout history, Christianity and feminism have not gone well together. So it seems I have another hurdle to jump when it comes to reconciling my feminist opinions, because I subscribe to the teachings of a holy book with passages by the Apostle Paul that say women must not speak up in church. At the same time, the first witnesses to Jesus' empty tomb were women. In an age when a woman's testimony was considered worthless, why would the Gospel writers have named Mary Magdalene as the first witness, and not someone more credible? If the resurrection never happened, that's a bad way to try and convince people that it did.
If people are wrong about Christianity being a misogynistic religion, then I'm probably wrong about my reasons for avoiding calling myself a feminist.
Maybe, just maybe, people of all religious and political persuasions can agree that feminism is about discovering what it means to be female. How to be feminine in a society that favors men, and not see that as a weakness. How to maintain a healthy identity when fashion magazines try to sell us beauty in a package, when toddlers in tiaras are in such a hurry to grow up, but women in their thirties are desperate to look younger. Most importantly, maybe feminism is about how to feel like a "real woman" even if you don't have much in the way of curves, haven't had sex, aren't married, or in a relationship, and despise dressing up. Maybe it's about appreciating the differences of both genders, instead of trying to make them one and the same, because we're not the same. We're made differently, we think differently. Or maybe it's about trying to find that common ground.
So. Am I completely crazy, or might I be on to something?
